The Word Cloud

Indulge in a candle-lit dinner in our seventeen-star Michelin Restaurant on the roof terrace. As the sun sets, the warm, still night air unveils a clear dusk view over the Parisian rooftops. Expert chefs from all over the world create-to-order the finest dishes your taste buds have been treated to. Select anything from our infinite global menu, and it will be whisked to your table instantly, where you may relax for the entire evening in the company of your terminally pretty/brutally handsome date. No one will urge you to hurry up and finish: take your time and enjoy a fourth bottle of Dom Perignon '75.

Make mine something really mouth watering that doesn't result in me gaining an ounce and I'll love you forever.

We have loads of foie gras on little toasts to start with...how about that? I'll get the chef and see if I can find someone to share this meal with you. Although it might be difficult, I think there is a match in tonight.

We can gaurantee that anything consumed in this restaurant won't put an ounce on you. You may order as much as you desire. Just go crazy for once.

Steve, I need one of those friendly bovines, the ones that have been bred to be eaten. Like the ones from the Restaurant at the end of the universe...I love that

Service! Can I have a chicken tikka on naan with salad and mild yoghurt sauce please. No, no poppadums for me.

Raita sauce ? Ok, safran rice ok ?

No, no rice. Just the kebab and hurry up cos I am starvin!!

Not very busy tonight is it?

No. Although it is Friday, I suppose. People are all out partying?

Alannah - here is your 'Dish of the Day.' He's very talkative tonight, and is suggesting that you stick your teeth into his rump.

Our Roof Terrace Restaurant scores over Milliways in one very important area: the universe doesn't come to an end at the close of the night. In fact, we sincerely hope that your future begins with a visit to our humble establishment.

That's great... Where's my kebab!

I've sent our runner round the corner to Abrakebabra.

Alannah - here is your 'Dish of the Day.' He's very talkative tonight, and is suggesting that you stick your teeth into his rump.

He was very talkative indeed, told me his entire ancestry going back to some cow, forget her name....heh heh. Very good rump indeed. Apparently, red meat is bad for you, I don't care....

Amazingly, you can eat what you like in here. Without any negative implications. Isn't that grand?

And the view from here is stunning. 

Oh no. Mr. Creosote has just ordered a waffer theen mint.

It's getting late and I should be getting home, but I'd love another tiny little Courvoisier please.

There's your Courvoisier. And for the horse?

(That won't work if you change your profile picture before you come back).

He's a Guiness lad, thanks, 10 litre bucket please, not too much froth as it makes him sneeze and believe me, this is not a pretty sight.

At least he didn't call for, 'A pint of Websters... heh heh heh.'

Good on him. I'm a Guinness lad too, so we look after it well here.

There's his bucket...

I would like to order something without SPAM

Am I too early? I've had a sod of a day, had to carry the horse home as he passed out after sampling too much of Steve's generosity, he's tucked up in his stall now with a bran mash and a hangover, so I need, in this order, a LARGE gin, an ENORMOUS champagne and a MINDBOGGLINGLY HUGE '97
Chateau Lafitte, all arranged within easy reach of the jacuzzi.