The Word Cloud

Hi there everyone,

Have just started writing a screenplay about a girl who comes to the UK on the Kindertransport. Below is the opening section. Thanks in advance to anyone who takes the time to look at it. Would be really grateful for any comments you can provide!

All the best,

Vero


INT. ROSA CRANE’S KITCHEN - AFTERNOON

September 2004. The Crane family is getting ready to celebrate the birthday of 80-year-old ROSA CRANE.

TITLE CARD: LONDON, 2004

The party is being held at Rosa’s North London home. Rosa’s daughter,

JENNY, is piping swirls of cream cheese onto crackers and decorating them with slices of smoked salmon and dill. Rosa is trying to get china plates out of a cupboard. Jenny’s children, SOPHIE 15 and BEN 12, are lounging in front of the TV at the other end of the room bickering.

JENNY

Mum, leave the plates.

Rosa ignores her.

JENNY (CONT’D)

Leave them. I told you, I’ll get to them in a minute.

ROSA

These will all have to be washed.

JENNY

Please, just leave them for now.

Rosa continues fumbling with the plates.

JENNY (CONT’D)

You’re going to break them... Mum, you’re going to break them.

BEN

Oi! Gimme that. What d’you think you’re doing?

SOPHIE

It’s my turn.

BEN

I was watching that!

SOPHIE

Not any more, loser.

A scuffle breaks out between the children.

SOPHIE (CONT’D)

Ow! You little dick! Ow. I bloody hate you!

Jenny abandons the crackers and marches across the room.

JENNY

Eh, eh, eh. Enough of that language.

BEN

Why does she have to be such a tosser?

JENNY

ENOUGH! Have some respect for your grandmother.

SOPHIE

He’s hurt my wrist really badly.

BEN

Yeah well, you shouldn’t snatch the remote.

Jenny switches the TV off.

JENNY

You’re supposed to be helping, not fighting with each other. You,

(Pointing to Sophie)

You go and help Gran with the plates. And you,

(Pointing to Ben)

Go and empty the bins and take the rubbish outside. Now. Chop, chop.

The children get up, grumbling.

SOPHIE

(Rubbing her wrist)

I still don’t see why I should have to be here.

JENNY

I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that.

Jenny gets a bin bag out of a drawer and gives it to Ben.

JENNY (CONT’D)

Here. Make sure you don’t miss any.

SOPHIE

Which plates do you want, Gran?

ROSA

These ones with the forget-me-nots.

INT. ROSA’S BEST SITTING ROOM - CONTINUOUS

The room has been decorated for the party. On the mantelpiece and sideboard, there are dozens of 80th birthday cards. Ben enters and tips the contents of the bin into the bin bag. Then he stops and starts to read some of the cards. Next he picks up a photo of his grandparents on their wedding day. As he does so, the back falls off the photo frame, and several other photos tucked inside fall out. Ben kneels and picks them up. There’s one of a young man in a WWII uniform - his grandfather. Another one shows a couple approaching middle age. He turns it over and frowns at the German writing he doesn’t understand: “With all our love Mutti and Papa, Vienna 1939.” As he examines the photo, he doesn’t notice Rosa entering with a vase of flowers. She glances over his shoulder.

ROSA

Those are my parents.

BEN

Your parents?

ROSA

Yes. It was taken in Vienna.

BEN

You mean Vienna in Austria?

ROSA

Yes. I was born there you see.

BEN

But I always thought you grew up in London.

INT. THE MENDELS’ APARTMENT, LIVING ROOM - DAY

Vienna, March 1938. The Anchluss is taking place. Mendel family - parents EVA and BERNDT and children, INGE 17 and ROSA 13 - are standing at the window watching in dismayed silence. Eva holds in her arms their youngest child, 5-year-old HETTIE. The apartment is spacious and comfortably furnished. Outside, Nazi storm troopers march in formation past the window. There are swastika flags everywhere, a brass band and triumphant roars from jubilant onlookers.

INT. THE MENDELS’ APARTMENT, DINING ROOM - THAT EVENING

The Mendel family is sitting round the table picking at their supper, apart from Hettie, who’s in bed. No-one’s hungry.

BERNDT

We don’t know for sure what’s going to happen. For one thing, there aren’t so many Jews here. Austria isn’t Germany. It’s a completely different country.

EVA

Not any more. And why should the Nazis behave differently here to how they’re behaving in Germany?

BERNDT

As long as we keep our heads down. As long as we don’t cause a problem...

EVA

And that’s your answer is it? Don’t cause a problem!

BERNDT

All I’m saying is let’s not panic. Not yet.

He gives a brief warning glance in the direction of Rosa, which she catches.

ROSA

Hey. I’m not a baby, you know.

EVA

Berni, we can’t just bury our heads in the sand and hope it all just goes away.

BERNDT

I don’t see what else we can do.

INGE

Pa’s right. What else can we do?

She gets up.

EVA

You’re not going out are you?

INGE

Friedrich’s taking me to the pictures.

EVA

Inge, I really don’t think that’s wise.

INGE

As Pa says, there’s nothing we can do, so we might as well go on as we are. Besides, it’s Cary Grant. It’ll take more than a few crazy Nazis to keep me away.

INT. THE MENDELS’ APARTMENT, KITCHEN - A LITTLE LATER

Eva is drying up plates. Rosa is putting them away in the cupboard.

ROSA

I almost forgot to tell you. Herr Weigel said he thought I’d be ready to take the chemistry
exam next term. It’s good isn’t it?

Eva puts the dishcloth down and turns to Rosa.

ROSA (CONT’D)

I’ll still be able to take my exams, won’t I?

EVA

Let’s hope so.

She embraces Rosa. The door opens, and Inge enters looking deflated.

EVA (CONT’D)

You’re back early. Was it full?

INGE

That’s right. It was full.

INT. INGE AND ROSA’S BEDROOM - THAT NIGHT

Inge is sitting at the dressing table wiping off lipstick. Rosa is sitting in bed watching her sister’s grim face.

ROSA

What happened?

INGE

Nothing for you to worry about.

ROSA

Tell me.

INGE

They spat at us. They called us lice and Jewish swine and spat. You won’t tell Mutti, will you?

ROSA

No, of course not. Don’t worry.

EXT. A STREET IN LONDON'S EAST END - EVENING

NORMAN LASKI, a well-dressed man of around 35 jumps off a double-decker bus and approaches the Jewish Refuge, which is located in a shabby tenement building. Along the wall, there's a line of refugees queueing for the canteen inside. The man bypasses the queue and enters the building.

INT. THE REFUGE CANTEEN - A MOMENT LATER

The president of the refuge, OTTO SCHIFF, silver hair, three piece suit, late 50s, watches as the refugees shuffle forward, collect plates of food from the serving hatch and sit down to eat. Laski enters.

LASKI

I thought I'd find you here. Have you heard the latest?

SCHIFF

About Austria?

LASKI

You've no idea how desperate it is there. The Viennese embassy's inundated with visa applications. People are queueing day and night. We can't just sit on our hands and do nothing. Not any more.

SCHIFF

Do I look like I'm sitting on my hands? Come to my office.

INT. OTTO SCHIFF'S OFFICE AT THE REFUGE - A LITTLE LATER

Schiff is standing behind his desk, which is heaped with papers. Laski is standing in front of him.

LASKI

I know how much you're doing here at the refuge. But this needs something different. Otto, you have contacts. It's time to use them.

SCHIFF

It's not as simple as you think. The economy's still very weak. People won't accept more refugees. The last thing we need is a backlash.

LASKI

You and I both know this country could take in many more than it has. To say nothing of the empire. For God’s sake, surely we can find somewhere for these people to go?

SCHIFF

The government still thinks it can make the Nazis change their policy.

LASKI

No doubt they think it’s just a bit of local difficulty and the Germans are all decent chaps really.

SCHIFF

It’s not that.

LASKI

That’s why we have to make them listen. People are suffering horribly. Two days ago, a friend of my father shot his wife and then himself.

SCHIFF

Very well. I’ll see what I can do.

INT. THE MENDELS' SITTING ROOM - MORNING

It's a beautiful spring Sunday morning. Church bells can be heard through the open window. Berndt is reading the paper, Rosa is sitting at the table doing homework, Inge is painting her nails. Hettie is being an aeroplane. She climbs on the sofa, jumps off with arms outstretched, and runs up and down the room. She knocks into Rosa, making her blot her work.

ROSA

Oh Hettie for goodness sake!

INGE

For the love of God, child, sit still will you!

Hettie ignores her. Eva enters carrying a pile of ironed laundry. Hettie catapults into her mother, knocking the laundry to the floor.

EVA

Oh Hettie! What a nuisance you are!

Hettie bursts into tears. Berndt puts his paper down.

BERNDT

Poor little mite. It isn't her fault.

EVA

I know. She badly needs to let off steam.

BERNDT

We could all do with some fresh air. What about a picnic?

ROSA

Oh yes! It's a perfect day for one too.

EVA

Is that really a good idea?

BERNDT

Of course it is. I don’t see why we should behave as if we're prisoners in our own home.

EVA

I don't know.

BERNDT

Well I do. We'll go to the Prater. Who wants to go on the ferris wheel?

EVA

Berni...

HETTIE

Me! Me! Me!

BERNDT

And so you shall my little aviatrix. Come on, let's get our coats on.

EXT. OUTSIDE THE PRATER GARDENS - AN HOUR LATER

The Mendel family, yellow stars stitched to their coats, are looking at a notice on the gate to the park: "No dogs or Jews."

EVA

We shouldn't have come.

Rosa puts her arm around her mother's waist.

HETTIE

But I want to go on the ferris wheel.

Berndt picks her up in his arms and holds her close.

BERNDT

Not today, my darling. Papa made a mistake.

HETTIE

But you said I could.

BERNDT

I know. I'm sorry.

ROSA

We can still have our picnic, can't we? Even if it's only in the garden at home.

BERNDT

Of course we can.

EXT. THE GARDEN BEHIND THE MENDELS' APARTMENT - AFTERNOON

The Mendel family is sitting on a picnic blanket on a patch of grass under a tree. Nearby, a group of neighbouring children are kicking a football about. A few adults are sitting on benches, enjoying the sun. Hettie is picking forget-me-nots. She offers them to Eva.

EVA

Thank you. They're lovely.

BERNDT

(To Rosa)

Would Madame like cheese sandwiches or fish?

The football rolls across the grass and lands at Rosa's feet. She gets up and takes it to the group of children, whom she knows.

ROSA

Here's your ball.

An unsmiling boy around the same age as Rosa takes it from her roughly. Rosa waits, hoping they'll ask her to join the game as they usually do.

BOY

What do you want?

Rosa shrugs.

BOY (CONT’D)

Go away, you filthy Jewish pig.

GIRL

Yeah. Go away, vermin.

The children begin to surround Rosa in a threatening way. One spits at her. Another picks up a stone. Rosa looks to a nearby woman who pointedly ignores what's going on. Rosa retreats towards her family. The children follow hurling abuse. A stone is thrown which hits Rosa on the back. Seeing them, Berndt, Eva and Inge get up quickly. Eva picks up Hettie and they all hurry indoors, leaving the remains of the picnic on the grass.

INT. THE MENDELS' KITCHEN - EVENING

Eva is making tea, watched by Rosa.

ROSA

Why do they hate us so much?

EVA

People are saying the Jews have made Austria weak.

ROSA

But that’s not true. Austria’s our homeland.

Berndt enters.

BERNDT

Off you go to bed now, Rosa.

Rosa kisses her parents and leaves.

EVA

I'm going to the American embassy. Even if I have to queue for a week, we've got to try.

BERNDT

America. Eva, we don't know anyone there, we don't speak the language. What will we do? How will we live?

EVA

Rosa's been thrown out of school. Inge's lost her job. And you - I worry about you every minute you're out of the house.

BERNDT

Things will calm down. I know the Austrians. They're good people at heart.

EVA

Did you hear what they said today? To Hettie, a five-year-old child.

BERNDT

My father fought for this country; he won a medal for valour. My parents and grandparents are buried here.

EVA

I don’t care. I'm going, and that's the end of it.

INT. BERTHA BRACEY'S KITCHEN - MORNING

BERTHA BRACEY, head of the German Emergency committee is standing reading letters from fellow Quakers in Vienna: "Dear Miss Bracey, We are turning to you with a request for urgent assistance on behalf of a further twenty-four Viennese families, whose situation has become impossible...", "Dear Miss Bracey, Please believe that we wouldn't have presumed to address you in this way if we weren't at our wits' end..." In the background the BBC Home Service is relaying the news. Bertha Bracey begins putting on her shoes, coat and hat, then pauses to listen.

RADIO ANNOUNCER

The Conference in Evian to discuss the plight of refugees from Nazi Germany has ended without significant offers to increase immigration quotas. Speaking on behalf of the government, Earl Winterton said Britain could not open its borders without a similar commitment from others.

BERTHA BRACEY

For shame!

She switches the radio off then leaves the house.

INT. BLOOMSBURY HOUSE REFUGEE CENTRE - AN HOUR LATER

ELAINE BLOND and DOROTHY HARDISTY are sifting through sacks of donated clothing. Dorothy Hardisty holds up a tweed jacket.

DOROTHY HARDISTY

These aren't in bad condition at all.

ELAINE BLOND

Put them over there.

Bertha Bracey enters and takes off her coat.

BERTHA BRACEY

What have we got?

ELAINE BLOND

A congregation in Finchley has donated a load of winter garments.

BERTHA BRACEY

At least someone has a conscience. I nearly wept with despair when I heard the news this morning.

DOROTHY HARDISTY

Everyone's waiting for someone else to make a move.

BERTHA BRACEY

Which means precisely nothing will happen.

ELAINE BLOND

People in the community are talking about making formal representation to the government, but they're afraid to stir up trouble.

BERTHA BRACEY

Someone should stir up trouble. In fact, I'll willingly help them. I'd rather like to give the stuffed shirts in Westminster a piece of my mind.

INT. THE MENDELS' SITTING ROOM - AFTERNOON

9th November 1938. Hettie and Rosa are blowing up balloons. Hettie keeps letting the air out of them to make a rude noise and giggling uncontrollably. Rosa keeps laughing too.

ROSA

Stop it, or they'll burst and there'll be none left for your party.

Eva enters.

EVA

Haven't you two finished yet?

HETTIE

How long til we sing Happy Birthday?

EVA

Not long now, sweetheart. We’ll start as soon as Inge and Papa come home.

HETTIE

That's ages.

ROSA

No it isn't. They'll be here any minute.

INT. BERNDT'S CLINIC - CONTINUOUS

Berndt, who's an ophthalmologist, is examining his last patient of the day. The clock reads ten past five.

BERNDT

There's a slight astigmatism. That's what's probably causing the headaches and blurred vision.

PATIENT

I see.

BERNDT

Don't worry. It can be treated.

Outside, there's a sound of an explosion, only far away. The patient stands up, puts on his hat, nods and leaves. Berndt carefully puts away his equipment and dons his own hat and coat. He opens the door to the clinic. Outside, there’s a distinct sound of a commotion and breaking glass, still quite far away. Berndt frowns, crosses the road and hurries towards the bakery. The sounds increase in volume as the commotion gets closer. It plainly involves a substantial crowd of people, but they are not yet visible. A plume of smoke can be seen rising from a nearby street.

INT. THE BAKERY - A FEW MINUTES LATER

The BAKER is beginning to shut up shop. He seems nervous, keen to lock the door and roll down the shutters. Berndt enters.

BAKER

Herr Doktor Mendel.

BERNDT

I've come to pick up a birthday cake. My wife ordered it a couple of days ago.

BAKER

Ah yes. It's here under the counter.

The baker puts the cake on the counter. Suddenly a huge, terrifying crowd of thugs swarms into the street outside. Many are armed with sticks and crowbars. They begin smashing in shop windows and baying for Jewish blood. Berndt looks out of the window and sees a man being thrown to the ground and beaten. He meets the baker's eye. There's no escape.

BAKER (CONT’D)

In here. Quick.

The baker opens the door to his stock room. Berndt follows him inside abandoning the cake. They hurriedly pull a heavy cupboard in front of the door. A second later, the windows are smashed in, and the furious, roaring mob explodes into the shop. Berndt and baker listen as they tear the bakery to pieces. Someone tries the door to the stockroom, but can't get it open.

INT. THE MENDELS' DINING ROOM - CONTINUOUS

Eva and Rosa are finishing preparations for the birthday tea. Hettie, wearing ribbons and her best party dress, is hopping up and down in excitement. All at once the Kristallnacht attackers can be heard approaching outside. The room is lit up by flames shooting into the sky. Eva and Rosa go to the window. They see the crazed mob enter the street.

ROSA

Mutti, what's happening?

EVA

I... I don't know.

ROSA

I wish Papa and Inge were here.

Eva squeezes Rosa's hand. Suddenly, there's the sound of the front door opening, and Inge and her fiancé, FRIEDRICH, enter. They're breathless, dishevelled, very scared.

EVA

Thank God! Thank God!

HETTIE

Where's Papa?

INGE

Isn't Papa back yet?

EVA

Not yet.

HETTIE

I'm scared.

She bursts into tears. Rosa picks her up and cuddles her.

ROSA

Shh. Don't be scared. It’ll be all right.

HETTIE

I want Papa!

ROSA

I'm sure he’ll be here soon.

HETTIE

Will God keep him safe?

ROSA

Yes. If we pray, God will keep him safe.

INT. THE BAKER'S STOCKROOM - CONTINUOUS

The enraged mob is trying to break into the stockroom where Berndt and the baker are hiding. It's clear the cupboard will soon give way. At the back of the stock room, there's a tiny, sealed up window. The baker tries to wrench it open. Berndt helps and together they manage to get it open. The baker climbs out into the back alley, followed by Berndt, in the nick of time as the cupboard gives way and the thugs break into the room. The two men run for their lives. Everywhere there is chaos and panic. Many buildings including the synagogue are in flames. The streets are full of broken glass.

EXT/INT. OUTSIDE THE MENDELS' APARTMENT - A LITTLE LATER

Nazi thugs hammer on the door of the Mendels’ apartment block and get it open. They enter and pound up the stairs. They take a crowbar to the door of one of the apartments. Some of them go in, and a moment or two later, drag a terrified elderly man outside. A couple more continue up the stairs. They kick at the door of the Mendels' apartment, but don't have the crowbar.

THUG 1

Come on open up... Open the goddamn door!

The thugs try to peer through the peephole in the door, then hammer on it again.

INT. THE MENDELS' LIVING ROOM - CONTINUOUS

Inside, Eva, Rosa, Inge and Friedrich wait in the dark living room with bated breath. Eva has Hettie in her arms.

INT. THE STAIRWELL OUTSIDE THE MENDELS’ APARTMENT -CONTINUOUS

The thugs continue to kick and hammer at the door.

THUG 2

We know you’re in there, you scum.

THUG 3 (O.S.)

(From downstairs)

Come on. We're going.

THUG 2

Fuck 'em. Let's go.

The thugs pause for a second then tramp back down the stairs.

INT. HETTIE’S BEDROOM - A LITTLE LATER

Hettie is lying in bed. Rosa is sitting beside her. Hettie is drifting off to sleep but still clinging tightly to Rosa’s hand. Eva is sitting on the end of the bed, with a story book on her lap. At that moment, the sound of the key in the lock is heard. Eva jumps up and goes out.

INT. THE MENDELS’ CORRIDOR - CONTINUOUS

Berndt hesitates in the dark corridor.

EVA

Berni?

BERNDT

Are the children in bed?

Berndt steps forward. Rosa comes out of Hettie’s room and glimpses her father’s face as he quickly turns away.

EVA

Rosa, go to your bedroom this instant!

Rosa goes quickly to her room but once inside turns and watches through the slightly open door as Berndt steps forward into the light. She clearly sees his face is bruised and covered in blood. Eva embraces him and Rosa sees the fear and horror in his eyes.