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Mozzie's Beta Barn

Mozzie's Beta Barn

Bite-size reading and feedback on my ongoing epic
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I'm putting out a call for reading and feedback on the multi-part work of dystopian fiction I'm writing. The work is divided into novellas and I intend to post the first novella here, on a chapter-by-chapter basis. Any and all feedback, observations, critiques and hints will be gratefully received, as will effusive praise and biscuits.

The series plots the journey of Elenna Pointer who, as an innocent child, was purchased by the Final Justice Department and trained from the crib to be an Executioner. The first novella is her prologue, her experiences as a student killer. The rest of the series follows her through adulthood and charts the people she meets, the situations she encounters, and the unfolding conspiracy that surrounds her and draws her into the orbit of the most powerful people in the land. She may only be a gutter Executioner, but she has a secret so complete that not even she knows what it is. But others do, and they want it.

The series features themes of social class, family, the dynamic that exists between the blue-collar drudge and the white-collar master, and it unfolds across a terrible parallel London in a Britain that exists in total isolation, where the common people suffer under the rule of a hedonistic elite and where, in order to suppress the masses, commoners like Elenna are forced to serve the overlords. Elenna Pointer exists in a dark place, but even for her there is hope...

Latest Activity


13 Member

  • JtF
  • Jaxx
  • Squidge
  • Philippa
  • Hil
  • Seagreen
  • JD
  • Newbie
  • Kate
  • MosquitoFB6
  • Hilly
  • L.

The Wall

7 Wall Posts

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  • Squidge
    by Squidge 3 months ago
    Got a bit of reading time, but confused as to which of hanging around or excessive mercy comes first? If you give me the heads up, I'll try and get a bit more read while I'm thrashing out a new storyline of my own...
  • Squidge
    by Squidge 4 months ago
    Didn't realise you'd put the second book up... Will ty to read, but a little caught up in life stuff at the mo I'm afraid. Will see what I can do for you.
  • Seagreen
    by Seagreen 4 months ago
    Sorry Mozz, for being so AWOL with your latest posts. Trying to catch up with some long-neglected writing of my own. Elenna is definitely on my To Do list...
  • Seagreen
    by Seagreen 7 months ago
    Chapter Seven is up. Loving the read so far... :-)
  • Philippa
    by Philippa 10 months ago
    have had a peep and comment
  • Squidge
    by Squidge 10 months ago
    Can't guarantee to do huge amounts of reading at the mo, but I'll do my best.
  • Newbie
    by Newbie 10 months ago
    Hi, Mozzie, I remember Elenna Pointer and am so pleased I get to read more of her.