The Word Cloud

All 15 exams are over! Year 11 is over! All lessons are over! GCSE's are over! - hum: I really need to get myself a hobbie!

I now have a Tumblr where I shall be posting some of my writing work:
http://forever-clockwise.tumblr.com/
So please do come and visit, and if you have tumblr, please follow :)

I just popped on to say hi.
And also to tell you ive got into 6th form :P
I just need:

• B in History
• B in English Language [ive got a C and aiming for an A)
• C in English Literiture
• Science C [got]
• Maths (module 1) C [I got an A anyway] 

So yeah. :)

This is a genuine complaint to Devon & Cornwall Police Force from an angry member of the public
A true email sent to the force, lengthy but brilliantly written...... 

--------------
Dear Sir/Madam/Automated telephone answering service, 
Having spent the past twenty minutes waiting for someone at Bodmin police station to pick up a telephone I have decided to abandon the idea and try e-mailing you instead.

Perhaps you would be so kind as to pass this message on to your colleagues in Bodmin, by means of smoke signal, carrier pigeon or Ouija board.

As I'm writing this e-mail there are eleven failed medical experiments (I think you call them youths) in St Mary's Crescent, which is just off St Mary's Road in Bodmin.

Six of them seem happy enough to play a game which involves kicking a football against an iron gate with the force of a meteorite. This causes an earth shattering CLANG! Which rings throughout the entire building.
This game is now in its third week and as I am unsure how the scoring system works, I have no idea if it will end any time soon.

The remaining five failed-abortions are happily rummaging through several bags of rubbish and items of furniture that someone has so thoughtfully dumped beside the wheelie bins. One of them has found a saw and is setting about a discarded chair like a beaver on ecstasy pills.

I fear that it's only a matter of time before they turn their limited attention to the caravan gas bottle that is lying on its side between the two bins.
If they could be relied on to only blow their own arms and legs off then I would happily leave them to it. I would even go so far as to lend them the matches.

Unfortunately they are far more likely to blow up half the street with them and I've just finished decorating the kitchen.

What I suggest is this - after replying to this e-mai l with worthless assurances that the matter is being looked into and will be dealt with, why not leave it until the one night of the year (probably bath night) when there are no mutants around then drive up the street in a Panda car before doing a three point turn and disappearing again. This will of course serve no other purpose than to remind us what policemen actually look like.

I trust that when I take a claw hammer to the skull of one of these throwbacks you'll do me the same courtesy of giving me a four month head start before coming to arrest me.

I remain your obedient servant

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mr ??????,

I have read your e-mail and understand your frustration at the problems caused by youths playing in the area and the problems you have encountered in trying to contact the police.

As the Community Beat Officer for your street I would like to extend an offer of discussing the matter fully with you.

Should you wish to discuss the matter, please provide contact details (address / telephone number) and when may be suitable.

Regards
PC ???????
Community Beat Officer

... but I dont care ;)

Today I had my parents evening. It was ok but Im here to tell you about the most amazing bit.

When I had my English appointment my English teachers said things like 'You a a the cleverest in the class...Your a pleasure to teah...'

But the best bit:
My coursework folder was chosen to  be send off to the exam board. And the exam board said that my origional writing (story) was 'capturing (or something to that effect)' and well worth and A*. But my teachers also said that the examiners thought my formal writing (persuasive writing etc.) was the best they have seen!
How amazing is that!

(I know I sound a bit vain/cocky, but im just so proud. Its made my year!) :P 

I dont know if anyone knows what Sochcahtoa is but basically its something to do with trigonomitry. Well no one could remember it so Mrs Siddle (my quite old maths teacher) told us to remember it like this:

Sex
On
Horseback

Can
Acctually
Happen

To
Our
Amazment 

 

 Ok here we go. This is a massive leap from where youve read (The Lilith Story). Lilith has been captured and this scene is leading up to a torture scene (nothing sexual I swear ;) ) and also a crutital moment in the story.


 She knew something was wrong before she opened her eyes. A deathly silence warned her of that, and unnaturally cold, damp air pressed agains her skin
 When she finally managed to lift her heavy eye lids her heart stopped, just for a second. Surrounding her a curtain of shadows his the walls of the room, making it feel almost infinite. The only thing to penatraid the black curtain was a face; white with death. Its eye's peirced Lilith's, searching.
 For a moment there was nothing, as the creature observed Lilith. She felt awkward, uneasy. Shifting slightly, she felt a tug on her left wrist. A thick, black chain was curled around her left wrist and, as panic set in, she realised that her other wrist and both ancles were also chained to the stone slab upon which she lie. Her only thought was to run, to get away from the shadows and the pale face, but as she writhed around on the slab, struggling against the chains, she realised that she was going no where.
 Defeated, she gave up trying to escape. Her chest heaved with powerful breaths, her eyes closed and her body relaxed. She had no chance of escape.


I know some bits read a bit awkwardly but just be honest (this is a first draft).

Thanks Guys
Matt :) 

... that was the noise I made when I read my Foundation English Language result. C!!!!!

I can now do the Higher English Exam in summer which means I can get anything from a A* - U (where as Foundation only lets you get C - U) and if I can get at least a B I can do English Language at A-Level.


Yayy! 

 Heya guys,
I just thought I'd tell you all about the latest events of my life; Its not good.

 At school over the past few months school has been getting increasingly harder and I've been feeling the presure. Exams, coursework, Homework, Friends, Enemies, etc etc. Those who say that school is getting easier should be shot... in their groin :P. People who are in high school or college will understand me here. I've got too much presure and work to cope with.... but thats not all....

 Many of you will have seen my pictures on the cloud of me and my 'good' friends. Well now I have no friends. Its a long and kinda embarasing story, but basicly I asked out a friend, well call her Hope, she said no (which is never nice - especially when youve had many nos in only 5 years of trying!), then my 'friend', who well call Rickard (aka Dick), got in there and told her that whilst she was away for Christmas I was going around flirting with other girls (which is bollocks). So basically thats Hope, Dick and Dicks girlfriend (by three 'best friends') now totally hate me for no reason.
 I dunno if that makes sence but itll have to do...

 Now im being forced to go back for counselling because I'm getting so down and I said something pretty stupid. Well when I say forced, I mean I dont have much choice.
 So basically Im just telling you that I've (in the space of a few days) reverted back to shy Matthew.
 I may be online a bit more from now on.....


Matt Robertson
aka. Clockwise 

For Christmas I got no less than 10, yes TEN, Stephen King books and I have no idea which to read first. If you've read them or simply like the title please help me to decide which to read first.
(from biggest to smallest) The options are:

• It
• Dreamcatcher
• The Dead Zone
• The Shinning
• Pet Sematary
• Cujo
• Gerald's Game
• Carrie
• The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon

So come on! Which one?