Anglo Saxon carnal verbs and adjectives
**Caution**
This blog contains words commonly considered to be strong
or foul language. There is no nudity except where essential
to the storyline and no animals were harmed in the writing of
this blog.
*********************
One of the finer moments of Ashes cricketing genius never
recorded in Wisden is a sledging incident in 1932 when Douglas
Jardine, batting at the time and the person in receipt of the
compliments, complained that the sledging was getting out of
hand. The Aussie skipper, Bill Woodfull, turned to his team mates
and with his hands on his hips called out:
“Alright, which of you Bastards called this Bastard a
Bastard!” - or so the story goes; and it is a good one so
let us believe it.
Although Bastard is an acknowledged swear word and even
allowing for the fact that we all know that it is a merely a word
in common usage in Australia, that was a hugely effective put
down and it is unlikely that anyone reading this finds it
particularly offensive. Yet, if it had been “Alright, which of
you Fuckers called this Fucker a Fucker” then it’s an entirely
different story. Many, if not most would see that not as a
humorously effective put down, but an aggressive response
and quite a few would find it offensive.
I find this interesting. Although not particularly relevant in
this day and age the term bastard originally meant a child born
out of wedlock, of lower social status, disinherited etc. One can
see how it has origins as a genuine insult that might well
persist to this day. Even though bastard is used as a swear word
at times it is nowhere as “strong” as Fuck and certain
derivatives, Fucker, Fuckwit etc. But Fuck is an old word for the
act of making love. This is something that is both pleasurable
and also quite important for the continuation of our species. Odd
don’t you think?
In medieval times one of the more unpleasant tortures for the
extraction of information, confessions and the like, was to be
stretched on the rack, to be “racked”. Yet we don’t say “Rack
you”, “Oh just Rack off, will you”. Quite a different use has
evolved. We “Rack our brains” when trying to remember something
that has slipped our minds.
Then we have human anatomy, of course. Possibly the strongest
insult that can be thrown is to call someone a cunt (so much so
that I dithered about inserting it here for some time). Yet this
is a proper noun for a part of the female anatomy and a word that
has been around for centuries that was used simply as a noun
for most of that time. It’s not just any female body part either,
but a part closely associated with the aforementioned act of
love. I expect it is no coincidence that men use this term much
more than women and that it is a female body part although I
don’t think I want to analyse that myself. Other less powerful
derogatory terms are prick, dick or cock, all referring to the
equivalent male body part. Their place in the pecking order of
insults may be gender related but nevertheless this is again
something that usually brings only pleasure, be it the act of
love or the eye watering pleasure that derives from relieving
oneself after six or seven pints of gut grobbler down The
Struggling Monkey, or any other purveyor of fine ales that you
may choose to honour with your patronage.
On the other hand (pun most intentional here) a fist is something
that brings pain. That is its purpose. It is something that one
makes in order to deliver a punch, part of fighting and I think
we will stick with that interpretation for now chaps. There is a
noun, Fisticuffs which is clear enough. Yet when we do something
well we might say that we have “made a good Fist of it”. Again
odd.
More light hearted perhaps we might call someone a Tit, or an
Arse in order to derogate them without fully antagonising them. I
feel I am qualified to give the male point of view which
normalises to considering these to both be female parts. I like
them both and see nothing negative or unpleasant in them at all.
I confess that in the great Agnetha-Frida debate of 1979 I found
myself to be most definitely a bums man, but I was unable to
choose between them despite hours of concentrated study.
That is not to the exclusion of breasts, far from it. But I
digress ( a weakness). It is now a polite and acceptable form of
curse to say “Bottom” rather than arse or ass, but it means the
same. Why on earth should these words be insults?
The next time you are skidding towards some disaster in your car,
wheels locked and tyres screeching, will you still cry out ‘Oh
“pleasurable act of love” it!!’ or ‘Get out of the way you
stupid “part of joy giving flesh”!!!’ Of course you will, but in
the traditionally abbreviated form.
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15 Comments
That said, the average guy in the street spends much of his time thinking of these particular bits and it comes ass (sic) no surprise that he vocalises his thoughts when he stubs his toe and is made to look a fool in front of his peers, the image that lingered in his head of that peach shaped portion of female anatomy is instantly translated into a word, thus, "Arse!"
This also explains why women use the word 'Prick' more than men, who in turn (much) prefer a good, "Cunt!" for emphasis.
Now, my favourite swear word is "Bugger!" and I'm not even going to start analysing that one...
EmmaD (I think, forgive me if it wasn't) wrote a blog some time back - no, wait, it wasn't a blog, it was this (or a derivative thereof) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gropecunt_Lane
By the way Alan, I may find myself in the 'bums man' camp too. And after what I have just written, I realise that there is a whole truck load of innuendo ammunition in that statement!...but you know what I mean!
Finally, innuendo aside (best to) - absolutely. Is it because it's the best bit or because it can be admired without being caught so easily, I wonder.
Yes I remember the Noel Coward songs, and I wonder too. No doubt some enlightened soul on the 'cloud' will tell us!
I think my son was a bit nervous, but he is a very level headed man. He said he knew we would handle it well. Of course that brought on the water works! Children; who'd have 'em eh!!
One of the nicest anatomical words, in my view, is 'boob' - lovely long vowel and nice labial consonants. (Compare with the thin, mean sound of 'tit').
Babies generally start off saying mum-um-um-um then bub-ub-ub-ub, varying these with mam-am-am-am and bab-ab-ab-ab. I'm with babies in this - they know what a nice word sounds like.
(For Biblical types, by the way, it's interesting the name that Jesus uses for his 'Father' - 'Abba' - a very intimate, childlike word - variation on bab-ab-ab-ab [something nice to bear in mind as counter-balance to some of the hate-filled stuff that comes from some pseudo Christians].)
In African languages, a man is often 'baba' and woman 'mama'. Also in Louis Armstrong's early records - 'Save it pretty mama.')
I'm not really wandering, just seeing how these sounds keep emerging (keep umma-mumma-merging).
Gerry, I know what you mean about the consonants. Babies start with mum-mum and ba-ba because control of the mouth muscles develops from the front backwards - which is why they tend to say Mama before Dada, and G and Ks are the last to come. I wonder if those plosives do feel in some way simpler and more comforting as a result?
I'd agree with you more about boob if it wasn't also a word for a mistake.
This was easier when I started it out discussing cussing (which rhymes) .
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