balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls

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Published by: you on 27th Apr 2010 | View all blogs by you

So, when the bounty on my back becomes a deadweight, I almost wish that I was apathetic. Wander on without worry. I fathom faith but I cannot find it. I would blindly follow the moon if it would petrude from behind the clouds. Dare anyone offer a hand, when I carry the weight of everyone I have ever loved in my pocket? I feel as though I am confessing trouble into the wind, and for a second it soothes me, and seconds later it is beyond an echo away. The shitstorm harbours it's intensity for when I think I am walking straight. Wishes don't exist and neither does my backbone...I am late. I hear no voices, but I hear a thousand. Oh, a paradox. I'm on my own, but I'm not alone. Another. Look at me, though -- I am smiling against it; knowing I'll wake up soon in my bed, breathing, right?

Comments

11 Comments

by zomb00 2 years ago

gay
by you 2 years ago

Couldn't think of an appropriate title.
by you 2 years ago

Nothing more appropriate than 'balls balls balls...'
by Wrathnar the Unreasonable 2 years ago

Totally can't think of anything to add to Andrew's cogent analysis.
by you 2 years ago

Super stuff, Shakespeare
by Bren 2 years ago

Did you wake up? You asleep when you writing? You would follow faith if you could find it? You could try some meditation to clear the clutter.
I want to say there, there. All will be well. :)
by mike 2 years ago

Not too sure what a shitstorm is?
by you 2 years ago

it's a colloquialism, I guess.
by Minxie 2 years ago

i just read this... am i the only one that likes it. i think it's brilliant 'you'... very clever. to believe in a faith you can't find is ultimate faith when you think about it? to carry everyone you love with you! confessing trouble to the wind (love that line)! trying to think of a name for it? a lonely wanderer longing for faith, against the elements, carrying the world on his shoulders - waking up in safety... good stuff - liked reading it - made me think - but you really need to find a better name for it!!! :]
by CJ 2 years ago

This is interesting. A part of me is almost jealous (when I write like this, I get told I'm overwriting and not to do it... maybe a more poetic form of prose might suit me better, I wonder?). The word shitstorm does jar with the overall tone, though - a colloquial violent word amongst a general feeling of (I think) confusion and loneliness (expressed in a rather more erudite way) clashes and, for me, doesn't really work. Also, pertrude? Did you mean protrude?

The problem (and the beauty) or pieces like this is that a lot is left to the imagination of the reader and so the meaning can come across as abstract. However, even if the central theme is obscurred, the emotions should stand out (for example, Armitage's 'Homecoming' is a profoundly unsettling piece of poetry, but not one of my classes can agree what it is exactly about!) - in this case, confusion and an almost crushing sense of hopelessness. What I would suggest is get some colour in there - give the painting something other than grey.
by Gerry 2 years ago

One way of describing this is that you're a long way into your right brain (i.e. the intuitional, imaginative, illogical etc side). It makes very little sense in left brain terms (analytical, rational, scientific etc). However, the weird thing about right brain things (love, religion etc) is they often matter a lot more to us than the sensible stuff from the left brain (mortgages, jobs etc). I can still remember nonsense my right brain threw up thirty years ago and more ("and there will be, yes there will be, dark winters known to none, save the children of Jezeviel"). I was staggering to breakfast at university hall of residence and not feeling totally awake. This half awake feeling is probably something akin to the mood of prophecy (if not the substance). Maybe even a distant relative of shamanism? We've got a very left-brain civilisation here, so such stuff can probably only survive as song lyrics (where it can, occasionally, do quite well).