The Word Cloud

Angelo the photographer was disappointed the sisters had misunderstood his offer of taking some private 'bare' shots.

@kallierosa My daughter is 17 now and I don't think she can read a clockface, although she was getting the general idea at 15. Everything is digital nowadays and no real need for youngsters to read a clock. My daughter certainly wasn't taught it in ...

Job title: Willy Watcher! Best wishes for getting this all sorted. When we're fit and healthy we take a helluva lot for granted.

@Alan - pm sent!

Your comp entry this month has a bit of reality about it.

Jake: We know it's not the most conventional of relationships but it seems to be working. I get home from work, go to the pool and we'll swim around for hours chatting about things. Y'know, how our days went, what we got up to, that kind of thing. ...

Pah! Nobody can be that nice. He's probably a secret axe murderer with 20 kids buried under his extensive patio. He doesn't fool me.

Wow. A really strong comp entry this month. Sad, vivid, strong. Excellent, thought-provoking stuff, particularly the ending.

The greatest achievement in the life of any human being is being the only one to penetrate the egg. I remember it well, it was bloody hard work I can tell you.

I'm much more interesting back in the wild, y'know.

This book is about me. It's about a psychotic nutter who'd stab that pencil in your eye just for the fun of it. But then again, he might not. I might. We 're both thinking about it. Probably best for all three of us if you just read the book.

That sofa is just one single item in a whole warehouse of goodies called Corbyn's Trident Scrappage (formerly known as The Money Tree).

"Others don’t. If you browse a porn site, I’ll know. If you connect with an offshore bank, I’ll know. If you’re having an affair, I’ll know." Ah, yes, but you don't know, not 100%, not unless you've got CCTV trained on my position. That ...