Quick Sixty

Published by: Barb on 31st Jan 2012 | View all blogs by Barb
Add the next piece to to story. The only rule is that each section is 60 words or fewer.

Birds don't chirp. Who thought of such a thing? Warbling, cooing, even arguing with squawks, if they're herring gulls. But not chirping. New model cars when you lock them with one of those electronic keys. Some mobile phones. But not birds. Roy was a chirper. Right from when he was a baby. But then again, most crocodiles are.

Comments

20 Comments

  • Noodledoodle
    by Noodledoodle 3 months ago
    But that was when he was a baby. Roy - or Viceroy if he was to be given his full name; at the tender age of six months could warble like Susan Boyle for a can of corned beef and for half a leg of lamb he could do a great Shirley Bassey. At twelve months we entered 'You've got Talent'.
  • Tony
    by Tony 3 months ago
    But he ate two of the performing poodles and was disqualified – something to do with unduly trying to influence other acts. It was very unfair, really. He wasn’t supposed to be appearing with the Animal Acts. He was entered in the Singers category, but at the last minute somebody made a snap decision and put Roy next to the poodles.
  • Amarantha
    by Amarantha 3 months ago
    Roy sulked for a while. He thought the poodle incident had destroyed his chances forever. Who would give him a hearing now? He lay in the shallows, chirping miserably, until Winston came along. "Hey Man, wassup?"

    Roy sighed and explained but Winston was a croc with ideas. "No problem, Man. Why not make a video and stick it on YouTube?"
  • spike1
    by spike1 3 months ago
    "I've tried using computers but every time I steal one from the humans and bring it home, all I get is bangs, flashes and smoke, I don't know what's goin on" sighed Roy.

    Winston shook his head sadly at the technical ineptitude of Roy and swam off to catch a wayward calf he'd spotted on the other side of the river.
  • AlanP
    by AlanP 3 months ago
    The calf would do anything to avoid being eaten and gladly agreed to operate the video camera that Winston had garnered from a careless wildlife cameraman six months earlier. Being young operating tech came naturally. But when he pressed the on button, the battery was flat. Fearing being munched the calf turned his doe eyes to the crocs.
  • stephenterry
    by stephenterry 3 months ago
    Roy shed a few tears as he munched on a juicy foreleg, but Winston was occupied with another distraction. An alien spaceship had landed close to the river bank; a door slid open and a most incredible, kingsize apparation appeared. It was wearing a top hat and tails, and in its paw a talking pickle jar.

    'What the...' Winston gasped.
  • Tony
    by Tony 3 months ago
    ‘I’m best before October, 2013,’ said the pickle jar, ‘but I’m really great right now.’

    It turned out it wasn’t an alien spaceship, but a Tesco’s delivery van in its new futuristic livery promoting all its latest hi-tech grocery lines with the slogan, micro-CHIPS WITH EVERYTHING emblazoned on its side.

    Mr Top-hat took one look an Winston and said:
  • AlanP
    by AlanP 3 months ago
    "Delivery for C. O’Dile?”
    Winston had been doing a bit of web shopping and was expecting a delivery.
    “We didn’t have any of your order in stock and I can see we have made a mistake in bringing Irish Stew. Instead would you like this all new singing and dancing pickle jar?”
    Roy looked up from the calf with interest.
  • Noodledoodle
    by Noodledoodle 3 months ago
    'Singing and dancing?' Roy thought, conjuring an image of Motown backing vocalists and lythe dancers in skimpy outfits. He snapped up Mr top hat and caught the pickle jar with his tail; a couple of belly rolls later, the man in the hat was safely wedged under a rock for a scooby snack later. 'Next stop, Simon Cowell'. Roy grinned.
  • MinxieAD
    by MinxieAD 3 months ago
    Roy tried to decide how best to eat Simon Cowell. He wanted to start at the head end so Simon couldn’t pick fault in his technique, but at the same time, he wanted to keep his teeth as a spare set for when he got older.

    Suddenly, the pickle jar began to sing. It sounded amazing. Could they win together?
  • Barb
    by Barb 3 months ago
    'Don't go breaking my heart,' sang Greeny.
    Roy sighed and looked away across the river. He'd gone off the idea of eating Simon Cowell, and they'd come home. He knew it was because he'd fallen in love with the pickle. They had so much in common - right to their knobbly, olive coloured skins. Greeny looked at him.
  • Tony
    by Tony 3 months ago
    ‘Gee, Mr O’Dile – ‘

    ‘Call me Croc.’

    ‘Gee, Mr – Gee Crock. What a big smile you have.’

    ‘All the better to eat you – greet you! All the better to greet you with. What’s your name, little Green One.’

    ‘People call me Greeny, but my real name is Gherkin.’

    ‘What, you’re called after a London skyscraper? Winston! You gotta hear this.’
  • AlanP
    by AlanP 3 months ago
    Winston was busy with a role playing game on the internet. He was about to trade a small planet for a mind controlled thermic lance when Greeny hit a piercing high note and caused him to miss out on the trade.

    His tail flicked in irritation and caught Greeny a swipe, sending him high into the air.

    “Nooooo,” cried Roy
  • Barb
    by Barb 3 months ago
    But Winston had opened his jaws and lined then up under the falling pickle. With a gulp, Greeny was swallowed.
    Roy put his head next to Winston's stomach. 'You all right in there?'
    'I don't know. It's too dark to see myself.'
  • AlanP
    by AlanP 3 months ago
    Roy still hankered after a career in show business. Thinking really quickly he told Greeny to practice saying tick tock as loud as he could.

    Turning to the computer that was still on the internet he quickly Googled, theatrical agents, pantomime, Peter Pan.

    In 0.62 seconds he had 62,200 results to browse. Roy settled down to read.
  • Barb
    by Barb 3 months ago
    'Err, Roy.' Greeny's voice had a dull echo.
    Winston started to laugh. 'He's tickling me, the crazy pickle.'
    'Roy.' Greeny tried again. 'There's something else in here with me. Something breathing.'
  • John Taylor
    by John Taylor 3 months ago
    It had been a bad day for Simon Cowell. The new band had acne, and the girl's voice had broken. And then the tip about the tech-savvy reptile. Well, at least a reptile wouldn't cry so much. But how he had ended up inside the reptile next to a prominent London landmark? No, Simon had lost all recall.
  • Barb
    by Barb 3 months ago
    And the landmark was talking, calling out to someone.
    'Please be quiet. I can't sort this out with you shouting.' Simon's eyebrows were threatening to leave the top of his head. 'These crocodiles were meant to be the next big thing. A new boy band called "Snappy".
    Greeny considered this. 'Wouldn't you need five of them?'
  • AlanP
    by AlanP 3 months ago
    Five singing pickle jars was a tall order even for someone as rich as Simon Cowell, who was used to getting what he wanted. He glared at his co judges for a moment, then threw a serious challenge out to his tame comperes Roach and Snail, on the stage, who were looking lost.

    For gawd's sake, find me a musical avocado.
  • Mme.Shriek
    by Mme.Shriek 1 month ago
    And lo, a shout went up from somewhere in the audience: "I can sing,but I need to get stoned first. But we need to get you outa dat feckin reptoile" called Mrs. Av O'Cado.
    "What's your name,darling?" said Simon. "Avril,sir". "Well,Avril if you can get me out of this joint,I'll help get you into yours".
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